Jokes,limericks,funny stories.

[Vampuric_acid]

Got any good jokes...well heres the thread to use them.
Also limericks or funny things that have happened to you or someone you know.

[KFT]

Oh look, there goes Vampuric_Acid,
Whose penis is ever so flaccid,
When looking for thrills,
He bought some cheap pills,
But they just turned out to be antacid.

[Amry]

They call it PMS because "mad cow disease" has already been taken.

*waits for applause*

.... anyone?

[Elijah]

Why did the one handed skeleton cross the road?

To get to the second hand shop.

[Vampuric_acid]

She stood on the bridge at midnight,
Her lips were all a quiver,
She gave a cough,
Her leg fell off,
And floated down the river.